Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.
A pair of immature detectives are joined by a pesky assistant district attorney in staking out a lakeside home where an important Mafia trial witness is believed to be heading.
When a globe-trotting, workaholic father trying to visit his daughter on a last minute layover in Los Angeles discovers that she’s disappeared, he forces her awkward, nervous ex-boyfriend, still nursing a broken heart, to help him find her over the course of one increasingly crazy night.
Recently orphaned, a young boy is taken in by his godmother who is shocked to realize that she can see the boy's imaginary friend: a flamboyant, French magician named Bogus.
A womanizer and a gold digger trick people into relationships with illegal robot doubles. When they unwittingly use this scam on each other, their robot doubles fall in love and elope, forcing the duo to team up to hunt them down before the authorities discover their secret.
When a possessed pair of jeans begins to kill the staff of a trendy clothing store, it is up to Libby, an idealistic young salesclerk, to stop its bloody rampage.
As a group of university students go out for a night on the town, a sophomore known only as "The Girl with Black Hair" experiences a series of surreal encounters with the local nightlife – all the while unaware of the romantic longings of "Senpai", a senior student who has been creating increasingly fantastic and contrived reasons to run into her in an effort to win her heart.
An art instructor and an English teacher form a rivalry that ends up with a competition at their school in which students decide whether words or pictures are more important.
Rachel loves her life, her students, her friends, her ex, her guitar lessons. When she falls in love with Ali, she grows close to his 4-year-old daughter, Leila. She tucks her in, looks after her, and loves her like a mother... which she isn’t. Not yet. Rachel is 40. The desire for a family of her own is growing stronger, and the clock is ticking. Is it too late?
Two apathetic police academy recruits who become best buddies through the tough training together witness a woman being abducted right before their very eyes. As they were taught in the academy, they quickly report the incident to the police, but the police are in no hurry to jump on the case. So the duo decide to take the matter into their own hands and rescue the woman.
After the closure of their shipyard in Northern Spain, a few former workers: Santa, José, Lino, Amador, Sergei and Reina keep in touch. They meet mainly at a bar owned by their former colleague Rico. Santa is the most superficially confident and unofficial leader of the group. A court case hangs over him relating to a shipyard lamp he smashed during a protest against the closure. José is bitter that his wife, Ana, is employed when he is not.
When a hotelier attempts to fill the chronic vacancies at his castle by launching an advertising campaign that falsely portrays the property as haunted, two actual ghosts show up and end up falling for two guests.
Turo is stuck in a small village and the best thing in his life is being the lead vocalist for the amateur metal band Impaled Rektum. He and his bandmates have practiced for 12 years without playing a single gig. The guys get a surprise visitor from Norway -- the promoter for a huge heavy metal music festival -- and decide it's now or never. They steal a van, a corpse, and even a new drummer to make their dreams a reality.