Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.
Fiona and Grant have been married for nearly 50 years. They have to face the fact that Fiona’s absent-mindedness is a symptom of Alzheimer’s disease. She must go to a specialized nursing home, where she slowly forgets Grant and turns her affection to Aubrey, another patient in the home.
When illegal card dealer and recovering heroin addict Frankie Machine gets out of prison, he decides to straighten up. Armed with nothing but an old drum set, Frankie tries to get honest work as a drummer. But when his former employer and his old drug dealer re-enter his life, Frankie finds it hard to stay clean and eventually finds himself succumbing to his old habits.
After six lifelong friends have a five-year falling out, “The Bobfather”, reunites his pals for the Buddy Games, an insane competition of absurd physical and mental challenges with the chance to win a $150,000 pot. Now all bets are off, as the determined dudes' fight, claw, and party for the big bucks.
Completely on her own, Sarah spends her time at home, waiting for the approaching birth of her child. But one night, a stranger breaks into her home, ready to snatch her still unborn baby from her.
In coastal Cornwall, England, during the early 19th Century, a young woman who's come there to visit her aunt, discovers that she's married an innkeeper who's a member of a gang of criminals who arrange shipwrecking and murder for profit.
Spoiled playboy Henry van Cleve dies and arrives at the entrance to Hell, a final destination he is sure he deserves after living a life of profligacy. The devil, however, isn't so sure Henry meets Hell's standards. Convinced he is where he belongs, Henry recounts his life's deeds, both good and bad, including an act of indiscretion during his 25-year marriage to his wife, Martha, with the hope that "His Excellency" will arrive at the proper judgment.
Aspiring actor Edward undergoes a radical medical procedure to drastically transform his appearance. But his new dream face quickly turns into a nightmare, as he loses out on the role he was born to play and becomes obsessed with reclaiming what was lost.
A womanizer and a gold digger trick people into relationships with illegal robot doubles. When they unwittingly use this scam on each other, their robot doubles fall in love and elope, forcing the duo to team up to hunt them down before the authorities discover their secret.
The imagined life of one of the world’s most famous authors, Emily Brontë, as she finds her voice and writes the literary classic Wuthering Heights. Explore the relationships that inspired her – her raw, passionate sisterhood with Charlotte and Anne; her first aching, forbidden love for Weightman and her care for her maverick brother whom she idolises.
Ema is a magnetic and impulsive dancer in a reggaeton troupe. Her toxic marriage to choreographer Gastón is beyond repair, following a decision to give up on their adopted child Polo. She sets out on a mission to get him back, not caring who she’ll need to fight, seduce or destroy to make it happen.
When a globe-trotting, workaholic father trying to visit his daughter on a last minute layover in Los Angeles discovers that she’s disappeared, he forces her awkward, nervous ex-boyfriend, still nursing a broken heart, to help him find her over the course of one increasingly crazy night.
After a wealthy philanthropist expresses an unusual interest in a ring found by her niece Annabelle, Miss Fritton explains that she's descended from a pirate who, in 1598, stole treasure from another: the philanthropist's ancestor. This discovery sends the racuous girls of St. Trinians on the hunt for buried treasure.
Su Qi-Er, a wealthy man living during the Qing Dynasty who loses his fortune and reputation as a result of a conspiracy against him. After being forced out onto the streets, Su dedicates his life to martial arts and reemerges as a patriotic hero known as the "King of Beggars."
1950. William Lee, an American expat in Mexico City, spends his days almost entirely alone, except for a few contacts with other members of the small American community. His encounter with Eugene Allerton, an expat former soldier, new to the city, shows him, for the first time, that it might be finally possible to establish an intimate connection with somebody.
Michelle and Allen, who have reached the point in their relationship where they are considering next steps, decide to invite their parents to finally meet and to offer some understanding of why marriage works. Except the parents already know each other quite well, which leads to some very distinct opinions about the value of marriage.
At the cusp of the founding of Joseon Dynasty, an envoy from China is delivering Emperor’s Ming’s Royal Seal. But nature in the form of a giant whale intervenes and swallows the royal seal. When a generous reward is offered to whomever can retrieve the royal seal from the belly of the whale, the race is on. A group of mountain bandits led by Jang Sa Jung and a group of pirates led by Yeo Wol go after the lost treasure, but who will get to to it first?